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by ByTheAngell (SomeLittleInfamy)



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-26
Updated: 2018-04-26
Packaged: 2019-04-28 02:35:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14439627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeLittleInfamy/pseuds/ByTheAngell
Summary: Left to his own thoughts for the first time that night, Alec has a decision to make once he gets into the cab.





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**Author's Note:**

> Just a short drabble set after 3x06!

“Where can I take ya’?”

Alec barely heard the question the first time, making a vague motion with his hand instead of answering. Alone in the back of the cab he finally allowed whatever drunken smiles and fake laughs he put on in front of his family and Underhill to fade, the alcohol muddling the thoughts that tried to cross his mind after the conversation he just had with Underhill. The one where he brought back up the exchange he had with Magnus in that same spot months ago, with a question he could get out of his head now.  _Are we too different?_

“You alright?” The cabbie asked, turning now. Drunk rides were far from unusual, though you could see the slight exasperation on his face at the idea of having to pry an address out of someone who looked like they didn’t even want to be conscious just then. Alec sat with his head in his hands for a moment, trying to collect himself… trying to push the words ‘too different’ from his mind long enough to say literally anything else when he looked up and opened his mouth.

“Yeah, yeah I’m-” Alec started, but cut himself off. He wasn’t fine, he couldn’t even say it for the sake of pleasantries with a stranger.

“Where are you headed?” The driver asked again. Alec opened his mouth, and then closed it again, slowly.

“Just drive for now.” He needed to get away from the bar - away from his family, and Underhill, and the memories of a date that started it all. He knew he couldn’t spend the rest of the night in a cab, though.

The hesitation had nothing to do with the alcohol, and everything to do with where he wanted to go versus where he needed to go. He needed to go back to the institute. He needed to take some time and sober up, to clear his thoughts before going back to talk to Magnus. He needed a lot of water, a good night’s sleep, and some solid food in him. Since he left the loft that morning (after barely touching his french toast) all he had was coffee and liquor. It was no wonder he was barely able to hold himself together. It made sense, and it was the responsible thing to do - it was what he  _should_ do.

…but what he  _wanted_ to do was find Magnus. What he wanted to do was ask him that question that played through his mind on repeat ever since he brought it up to Underhill just minutes ago, and not leave until he had an answer this time. He didn’t want to walk away again. He wanted to go home to the warmth of the loft, despite how cold things were between Magnus and himself when he stormed out that morning, and not to the duties of the Institute.

He wanted to go home.

He barely realized he thought it at first, but once he did it wouldn’t go away. Maybe Magnus wasn’t ready for him to move in yet, but that didn’t make the loft feel any less like home to him. Because it was where Magnus was. It was where they had breakfast, and where they stayed awake long into the night discussing things on each other’s minds… or enjoyed other activities to keep their minds off of those things, depending on what the situation called for. It was the place his mind turned to in moments like these, the one that brought him comfort, and that had to count for something.

“Home. I’m going home.” Alec said finally, giving the address as he leaned his head back against the seat, closing his eyes against the spinning surroundings for the remainder of the ride back to Magnus’ loft.

**Author's Note:**

> (Find me on [Tumblr](http://bytheangell.tumblr.com))


End file.
